Coworker Went From Inappropriate to Mean!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about sexual advances and verbal abuse:

My coworker used to make sexual advances towards me, asking why I wouldn’t sleep with him and when was I gonna sleep with him and saying how bad he wanted to sleep with me.One night at work he got upset with me about something pertaining to the job and he told me he would never speak to me again. That was about two months ago and he hasn’t said much of anything to me.The other night at work a coworker of ours told me that he said “Fuck that Bitch” referring to me, and he also said he knows I talk about him too, although I don’t.Later that evening we got into a verbal altercation and he called me ugly and told me my teeth were big. He also stated he would only have sex with me from the back with a bag over my head. What do I do now?

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Sexually Harassing Coworker

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about a bullying and harassment: he continues to cuss and talk about his penis and women’s tits. Should I see an attorney?

I work with a guy that is a bully and has been written up twice for calling me a fucking bitch and then for cussing in front of a command officer. He is my partner at work and they keep putting him back with me and behind their backs he continues to cuss and talk about his penis and women’s tits. Should I see an attorney?

Signed, Woman Partner Of A Sexual Harassing Bully

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Consensual Affair Turns to Harassment

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about an affair that turns to harassment: Boss made demands; he got very mean and threatened me because “he had enough evidence to drag my name through the mud like the piece of “sh!t I am”.

I have been working for my employer for almost 8 years under one manager – who at times I would even describe as a best-friend. My boss and I were on a business trip and he made an advance I succumbed to due to being highly intoxicated – as was he. When we got home from our trip we discussed this was a bad idea, but that it was a little fun. The next thing I know – he’s giving me money to have my breasts done, knowing I was self conscious about this part of my body. He and I had a 4 month consensual relationship mostly via texts (which I deleted) and emails (also deleted). He made a lot of demands on me for my attention, fighting with me if I didn’t offer photos or enough time on the phone.

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Bullying, Harassment and Discrimination

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about bullying and discrimination: I have been called names, told I am a slut, that I sleep with men on the first date, told I wear stripper shoes, etc. I am referred to as the “white girl.”

I am the subject of workplace bullying, harassment, and reverse discrimination. I have been called names, told I am a slut, that I sleep with men on the first date, told I wear stripper shoes, etc. I have recently relocated from the east, and I am told that the state that I come from is nothing but white trashy people with no teeth. I received an email with a link to which involved a humiliating incident which happened in my home state. The perpetrator wrote “Oh my God….only in (name of my state).” I am angry and unable to sleep and eat, and my stress level has reached its peak. Please advise me. I have filed a complaint through my manager, and HR. I do not think anything is going to be done. I am also made fun of for the way I speak. I am referred to as the “white girl.” This has got to end. I see someone who wrote to you and signed it, “Worried”, thinks she didn’t do anything, and ironically my abuser doesn’t think she is at fault either, in fact, she tried to blame me!

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Is A Regular Insult Sexual Harassment?

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about insulting a coworker by saying “it’s no wonder you’re not married.

I got into a heated argument with a co-worker. Five other people were in the room. During the argument I said to my co-worker, “You’re such a liar, it’s no wonder you’re not married!” The witnesses heard this. Later, I was accused of sexual harassment and received a written warning. Is my comment considered sexual harassment?

Signed, Angry

Dear Angry:

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What Is Considered Sexual Harassment At Work?

Question:

I would like to know what is considered sexual harassment in the workplace.

Signed,

Wondering

Answer:

Dear Wondering:

This is what the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission) provides as an applied definition (not the legal terms) of Sexual Harassment:

“It is unlawful to harass a person (an applicant or employee) because of that person’s sex. Harassment can include “sexual harassment” or unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical harassment of a sexual nature. Harassment does not have to be of a sexual nature, however, and can include offensive remarks about a person’s sex. For example, it is illegal to harass a woman by making offensive comments about women in general. Both victim and the harasser can be either a woman or a man, and the victim and harasser can be the same sex. Although the law doesn’t prohibit simple teasing, offhand comments, or isolated incidents that are not very serious, harassment is illegal when it is so frequent or severe that it creates a hostile or offensive work environment or when it results in an adverse employment decision (such as the victim being fired or demoted). The harasser can be the victim’s supervisor, a supervisor in another area, a co-worker, or someone who is not an employee of the employer, such as a client or customer.” **************** You can find other information about sexual harassment on a variety of sites. It’s important to be clear in one’s own mind before making an allegation of that nature, because some people use the accsuation as a weapon to hurt others with whom they’re angry rather than a tool to improve the workplace when change is needed.

If you have questions about specific issues at your work you might also want to talk to HR or to an Employee Assistance counselor or similar resources.

Best wishes!

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Sexual Harrassment And Retaliation

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about sexual harassment and retaliation: They made comments to a man in another department portraying me as a slut that chases men and screws around. I have never done anything to justify their comments. I have been very uncomfortable and crying a lot.

I am the only woman working with 14 men. Two of these men don’t like me at all. One of them was written up for cell phone abuse and they think I had something to do with it. They made comments to a man in another department portraying me as a slut that chases men and screws around. I have never done anything to justify their comments. I have been very uncomfortable and crying a lot. I went to another of our stores to get advice from a woman in management. The woman, who took my personal cell number I gave to her, was upset and told her male manager what was going on. He told my boss in a staff meeting what was going on.

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Unintended Threesome

Question:

My boss has had an ongoing romantic relationship with another employee. The other employee has made multiple sexual advances to me which I denied (I am married). The boss found out that his girlfriend/employee made advances towards me and now treats me in a negative manner. In addition, because I rejected her advances, she treats me with an attitude and speaks badly about me. Should I inform his boss of what has created an unhealthy work environment for me?

Signed,

Man In The Middle

Answer:

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Comments Made About My Slip Showing

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about groomig:

A number of times recently my slip has showed below my dress and although as soon as I am aware of the problem I go to the ladies room to pull it back up a certain co worker takes great delight in shouting out “Charlies Dead again, Sue”He will even follow me just to tell me that my slip is showing. He says it excites him seeing me just trying to correct the elastic waist band. I am worried about his behaviour and quite embarrassed. Is this normal male behaviour or should I report it? I do not want trouble.I have tried wearing a full slip so that it will not slide down below my dress but it is to hot and uncomfortable in the office. What is the best action to take?

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