Should I Tell My Manager How Attracted I Am to Her?

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors wondering
whether or not to reveal a crush on a manager. 

I am a man who works in a family-owned wholesale company, outside of the United States. The husband is our General Manager. The wife is our Administration group manager and I am the business development manager. I have worked here for 4 years. Things seem to be developing like you read about only on the Internet–on how your boss man or lady is attracted to you.

Last year I started having problems with my marriage, but I did not see a counselor. My group manager saw that my performance dropped during that time and asked about it and I openly told her my problems. Ever since then, I have noticed my feelings growing for her. She does a lot for me–extra favors and extra money, which I reimburse. She has me assist her family, such as taking her Dad to see the doctor, because her husband is so busy as the GM.

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I Have a Crush on a Coworker But Now Our Communication is Awkward

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about how to handle the
awkward results of having a crush on a coworker. 

Question: 
I started this job three months ago where I developed a crush on a coworker right away who turned out to be married, we’re not in the same team so we don’t technically cooperate that much. I caught him so many times gazing at me right from his office and when he walks next to me. He once approached me and said : “Hi, how are you?” and I did not respond because I thought he was talking to someone else. The thing is those stares of his are kind of flattering and yet a bit uncomfortable since he’s a married guy and I feel it’s inappropriate to play the starring game with him. So, each time I see him walking towards me I act unintentionally awkward and turn my head away. Each time we come to catch eyes I turn my gaze down.

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Don’t Want to Hurt Coworker’s Feelings

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about not wanting to work with a coworker:

A male custodian spoke with me today about his job situation. He has been working closely with a female custodian since he began working here several months ago. He wants to work independently now because she is depending on him for more than he is required to do. He feels uncomfortable telling her he doesn’t want to work so closely anymore. He doesn’t want to hurt her feelings. What should he do?

Signed—Wants Not To Hurt Feelings

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Moved When I Spoke Up About Unfair Treatment

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about unfavorable treatment:

I work for cleaning company. I have noticed certain things being handled that are shady when it comes to other employees: how they are paid amount of hours, overloaded work assignments, and unfairness to employees with seniority. Coworkers won’t address out of fear, but I have addressed my issues my rights and have been moved to other area with no explanation.

Signed—Moved to Speak Up

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A Brief Affair is Over–But the Angry Wife Is Trying to Get Me Fired

A Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about what to do when
a brief affair with a coworker is reported–by the coworkers wife.  

Question:

I have gotten into a difficult situation that may effect my job. I had a brief affair with a person that works at my company that included meeting out of the office on company time. Therefore, I could possibly be fired for filing a false time sheet. The wife of the coworker with whom I had the affair found out and has been harassing me by contacting my friends and family to expose the affair and now has also contacted my supervisor.

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What To Do When I Am Shut Down and Shut Out?

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about how to handle
times of disagreement with the boss or when one is prevented from
learning and presenting ideas. 

Question:
I read a response to a question on this site about co-workers teaming up against another employee. I interpreted the response as saying that sometimes when people go up the corporate ladder it invokes jealousy. Or, sometimes people don’t fit into the office team culture. You suggested frequency of meetings that include all team members, to encourage participation and problem solving.

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“Mistryst”–My Husband’s Accused of Sexual Harassment

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about probable firing of her husband accused of sexual harassment:

My husband has had a complaint of sexual harassment against him; this occurred 2 years ago. The scenario is that after a drunken night out with co-workers while in Japan, he took one of the woman back to his room. When he got there, he realized it was a mistake, but by this time the woman had missed her train and they spent the night together but both claim nothing happened, he says. I don’t know if I believe this. My husband was reprimanded by the company for this.

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What Can We Do To Stop a Meddling Coworker?

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about how to stop a coworker from meddling, interrupting and interfering in the work of others. 

Question:
I work in an office of around twenty people. One member of staff causes problems for the rest by constantly snooping and interfering. She eavesdrops on every conversation and feels the need to comment on matters that are no relation to her job or department. Every decision I or anyone else makes is questioned by her, despite the majority of matters having no effect on her.

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What Should I Do If I Have No Work To Do In My New Job?

A question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about how to
handle a situation where there seems to be no work in a new job. 

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QUESTION:
I just started a new job 2 months ago, in the same field of work as I’ve done for 27 years. I couldn’t wait to work for this company, because it sounded like the perfect place to work: It’s a small company, seemed like a lot of nice people, I’d have more variety, I’d be creating the “standard” for new employees and moving up the company, as I was told, is common place.

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Fired by Boss Having an Affair

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about being fired by a friend’s boss having an affair:

I was fired from Microsoft in 2004. (writing anonymously for now)

I knew it was going to happen the minute my best friend’s husband became my new supervisor. 20k employees, and he ends up being my boss. My friend and I met at our daughters’ daycare not at work! What were the odds.

He was having an affair with a woman down the hall from us. I figured it out at the Holiday Party, 2003, that was hosted at the Seahawk Stadium. I confirmed it with my friend, who had not told me yet. She had herself only just learned of it.

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