Can Spouses Stay Friends In Spite of Workplace Problems Between The Other Half of the Couples?

A Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors:
How can I find out if  the wife of my husband’s former coworker
wants to stay friends with me? 

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Question:

My husband and his good friend/co-worker applied for the same job and my husband got the promotion. My husband was able to overlook some of his coworker’s faults because of their friendship, but when my husband moved into a supervisor role he has had to address some of the ongoing issues and they are no longer friends. read more

“Ask The Workplace Doctors” Is A Free Workplace Communications Resource!

For over two decades, Ask the Workplace Doctors, the site developed by William I. Gorden, Ph.D., of Kent State University, School of Communication Studies, has been a workplace communications resource for thousands of people from around the world. You can still count on us to provide practical, reasonable, useful and compassionate advice.

Ask the Workplace Doctors invites you to:
•Ask a question about your workplace communication problem.
(We cannot respond to medical questions–please talk directly to a medical professional.)
•Search for answers in our archive of over 3,000 questions and responses.
A NEW FEATURE!
Share your “Good Feeling Workplace Moments”! read more

How Can I Tell My Boss I Have Too Much Work To Do?

A question to the Workplace Doctors about feeling overworked but not knowing how to tell the boss. 

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Question: I want to speak to my boss about him giving me too much work. I have been pushy about proving myself by initiating a lot of projects (inside and outside the bounds of my job responsibilities) and sprouting ideas–all of which have been very successful in a very short amount of time. However I feel that as a result, now my boss entrusts me with a little too many responsibilities (it’s too early to ask for a promotion, by the way). read more

How To Repair A Bad Opinion By A Boss?

A question is asked about how to repair a bad opinion by a boss, based on something that happened in a meeting. 

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Question: 

I’m mid-level in the advertising business where it’s important to be a go-getter. My company recently met with a collaborating company to discuss a joint-ad campaign. However, their terms were not favorable to us. I was more familiar with the account than my boss—he was at this meeting to finalize the terms of the deal. read more

Stalked By My Boss’s Jealous Wife

Question for Ask the Workplace Doctors about being stalked by a jealous wife: 

“My boss’s wife is jealous of me and  I think she is stalking me. What can I do?”

Dear Workplace Doctors,

I am a female electrical engineer working in a research development group. I have two little children and I support my husband who has a medical problem and cannot work full-time.  My boss and all of my co-workers are male. I have been at this new job for about 4.5 years. My boss is one of the toughest people I have ever worked for and I have had to complain to  his boss and HR about his aggressive anger toward me, in the past.  He fights with my other coworkers the same way but he doesn’t seem to be as aggressive toward them as he is to me. I have had miscarriages while I worked there and never even felt I could tell him I was pregnant, because I didn’t want him to know. read more

Wants Recognition For A Worthy Charity

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about gaining support for charity: has support from celebrities but lacks popularity of a competing group.

My question is not regarding paid work, but my unpaid volunteer work. I am the founder and president of an event under a convention. What my group does is entertain guests at conventions as famous heroines and heroes from the films of the genre that the convention is all about. However, when I created the event, I wanted it to be more than simply dressing and delighting as beloved characters, but also go beyond and act as real heroes. Thus, at conventions, my group will hold charity drives. This summer we held a canned food drive and, a few weeks ago, we held a clothing drive. read more

Does not Accept Me As Boss

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about a male subordinate who does respect her as boss:

I have a subordinate who I feel does not treat me like his boss. I believe there are multiple factors 1. I am female,  2. Have equal educational qualification.  He sometimes talks to me as though I am his friend. For instance on his first day of his job, he was asked me what’s my background. I guess he was trying to assess how come I am in a superior position. Another instance was when, in front of many people, he motioned with his his fingers signaling me to come to him. Seriously i did not liked that and thought to discuss his behavior with my boss but later declined this thought. read more

Avoiding Judgment of Non-Participators

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about those who don’t participate: It’s not good to judge others, but what can you do to get non-participators to come on board?

What can members of a team do to not pass judgment on another team member who does not participate? How do you get him/her to come on board?

Signed, Get On Board

Dear Get On Board:

Yours is a common question because team member’s commitment and effort often are not equal. Forget not being judgmental. It’s impossible not to become aware of members who don’t pull their own weight. The issue is then bound up in your second question: How do you get a non-participant to come on board? There is a generic answer of how to cope with such behavior constructively; however, each situation hinges on the task and composition of its team. Therefore, analysis of your situation entails first-hand knowledge of the history of your team and the rewards that come from working together effectively and/or penalties for not. read more

Sensitive and Lonely

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about feeling left out: How can you get people to like you at work after being there for about one and a half years?

How can you get people to like you at work after being there for about one and a half years? It’s hard to talk in the environment we work in as it’s always heads down working. How can I stop being so sensitive and taking things too much to heart?

Signed, Want To Be Liked

Dear Want To Be Liked:

Good for you. You want to be liked and are not ashamed to admit it. Work is hard and it is especially hard when you don’t feel appreciated and have at least one or more coworkers you know are friends. You don’t say what kind of work you do, only that where you work “it’s always heads down.” Therefore, I assume that you are engaged in work that demands attention to what is before you and every second counts. If you have not been able to talk with coworkers after being there for a year and a half, should you give up? read more

Anon

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors, not really a question:

Cool site

Signed, Anon

Dear Anon:

Thanks. I’m pleased you find it cool.

William Gorden