Author: Tina Lewis Rowe

Tina had a thirty-three year career in law enforcement, serving with the Denver Police Department from 1969-1994 and was the Presidential United States Marshal for Colorado from 1994-2002. She provides training to law enforcement organizations and private sector groups and does conference presentations related to leadership, workplace communications and customized topics. Her style is inspirational with humor.

What Is Indirect Counseling?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question: What is the meaning of indirect counseling?

Is your question prompted by some incident in which you were told that you were being counseled this way? Our expertise is in communication-related work questions. We don’t claim psychological clinical certification; however, we have had considerable education in psychology. Based on that, the term indirect counseling dates back to the  work of Carl Rogers and others (1950’s) who advocated that those seeking personal advice are best served by not being told how to solve their problems but guided to reflect on causes and possible solutions to problems. 

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What Can I Do If I Think I’m Being Blackballed By An Employer?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors: I believe I’ve been blackballed by an employer. It stems from taking a test that I had to pass and I didn’t pass it. (Test taking anxiety. ) They wouldn’t let me take it again. I applied for another job with a company that is under the same contract as the manager of the first company, and they said I was not eligible for hire. Is there any course of action I can take? Or just make sure I avoid this employer?

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Micromanaged and Overworked: What Can I Do?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors: I am the Head of Operations at a hospital and the pressure is as imagined. This administrative role involves ensuring the business and process end of the Organization is in form. I am also in charge of business development for the Hospital.

I have been burdened with a checklist which the Medical Director demands to see everyday (this is because I have not been diligent with it). The problem is this checklist is not completed through a reported format. It involves me directly unearthing a thousand and one possible process errors committed by any of our medical and non-medical staff in the previous day – from billing to drug request process errors. By the time, I get through correcting things and informing Department Heads, the day is almost gone.

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How Can I Stop an Affair With My Boss?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Note: This was a very complex situation. We have changed and condensed the question considerably, to protect the identity of the person asking the question. However, we thought our response would be helpful to others.

Question: Several years ago, as a very young employee, I was going through some personal issues and my boss, who is twice my age, helped me work through them. The result was that we became close and have been in an affair since then. Now, however, I want to end it so I can start having a normal life with friends and people my own age. I’m also tired of juggling my schedule to have stolen moments.

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Should My Manager Be Allowed to Call Me a B–?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question: I work at a carry-out restaurant. I have three managers. Two of them I get along with very well, but I have always felt like the other manager has something against me. I’m 16, this is my first job, and I try to do my best at work.

Today we were really slow and we had stocked everything and cleaned everything. We had no orders out and there was nothing to do. I was talking to one of my coworkers about a video of me. She asked to see it and I pulled out my phone.

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My Boss Won’t Use My Name

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question:  I work for family owned business. The owner and his two sons are white. One employee is White, one is Hispanic and I am Black. My boss addresses me as “ helper”, never by my name. I’ve been there a year. I’m feeling discriminated against. What should I do?

Response: I’m not clear on how someone could avoid calling someone by their first or last name for a full year! Does he say, “Hi, Helper, how was your weekend?” Or, “Bill, why don’t you and Helper work on this?” That would seem very odd. Or, does he just introduce you as a helper in the company? Or, put you on the organizational chart as “Helper” instead of putting your name? I would like to know more about that!

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Can I Report My Husband’s Online Activities to His HR?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question: My husband is cheating on me. I found he has been having online sex with a foreign woman. They are planing to move together.

More over, He had sex with this woman online video during work hours in his office.

Can I report my husband affair to his HR?

Response: Thank you for sharing your frustrating and hurtful situation with us. It sounds as though you will be much better off to not have him in your life!

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Can My Boss Tell People If I’m Working or Not?

Tina Lewis Rowe

Question: Is it legal for my manager to disclose if I am on or off the clock to the general public?

Answer: We always remind people that we are not attorneys or HR specialists. In your situation, the law would have to be a state law, since it does not come under a federal mandate of which I am aware, speaking as a layperson. You should consult the website of your Department of Labor.

However, as a matter of practicality, yes under many circumstances it would be an employer’s right to tell someone if you are “off the clock”, meaning not working.  For example, a customer calls and asks, “Is Mark in today?” “When will Mark be back to work?” “What day would be the best to talk to Mark about my (Whatever). In those cases, an employer is providing information that is necessary to do business.

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