Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about my boss’ affair with co-worker:
My boss is having an affair with one of my co-workers, and the co-worker is given accounts that should be given to others. The affair has been going on for 4 years. It has been brought to the attention of our CEO, but nothing has happened. Their affair is obvious and sometimes is very distracting. They argue in the office, spend hours behind closed doors, and have been spotted parking in out of the way places. Do we ignore the situation or do we go to higher CEO.
Signed, An Affair On The Clock
Dear An Affair On The Clock:
You say that the CEO has been told about this and nothing is done? So to whom would you report it higher? And if you do, what will you say? Will you complain about the unfairness of who has been given accounts that should have gone to others? What proof do you have of that? And why is the affair distracting; in what ways and how does it distract from your work? Shouldn’t you enjoy watching? Doesn’t it provide gossip and doesn’t that spice up the day? I’m just kidding, but get my point? Unless you have hard evidence and unless there is provable injustice, you can do little but gossip and complain. However, if you and other coworkers are really stressed by this and if you are willing to risk being targeted by your boss in one way or another, a squeaky wheel does get greased. Especially a complaint gets looked into if there is a risk to the company of an affair going sour and consequently of the company being charged with sexual harassment.
Four years is a long time to look past the kind of behavior you describe. In the past too often the subordinate gets the boot and the boss stays in office, but in these times a cover up can cost big bucks. Soooo if you mean business and are willing to speak up and also in writing request an investigation, I predict that the affair will no longer be behind a closed door. What is really your goal? Are you just jealous or are you really treated unfairly? Do you want to hurt either the boss or his coworker? Or do you simply want to treat him and her, as you would want to be treated? Have you spoken to him frankly and about what you think is unfair? Why don’t you? After all he should know that you could blow the whole affair up by making a stink!
Wouldn’t it be courageous and kind to speak kindly and firmly about what you see as unfair and unprofessional?How do these thoughts strike you? Do they make any sense? You’ve allowed this thing to go on for four years and have turned a blind eye to it. Well not really a blind eye, but anyway you have not voiced yourself. Have you?The goal of everyone and every workplace is to survive in these hard times. To do that we all must work honestly and productively. That should be your and my day-in-day-out attitude and action? What are you doing to work together with caring hands, head, and heart? Doing that takes and makes big WEGOS.