Boss Said He Would Kill Me If I Quit!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about threat:

My boss today brought a sword to work, and he smashed my fan and knocked things off my desk with this object. He is a verbal and mental abuser. What legal rights do I have? This is a small company with no benefits; nothing! Every time I try to leave, he promises he will not do this again. He also says that if I do quit, I will never work in this industry again (mortgages). The problem is that the license for this business is under my brother’s and my name. What can I do? He has on more than one occasion told me he would kill my children or me if I tried to go. What can I do? I am afraid to press charges against him. I fear for the safety of my children

Signed, Working Scared

Dear Working Scared:

Fear is exactly what is keeping you in this totally unacceptable and dangerous situation. You must remove yourself from this psychotic person’s control. You will live in this fear until you find the courage to move on. The threats will not end until you remove yourself from this intolerable situation. You can deal with the license and other issues once you can get professional counseling and leave the control of this person.

This is akin to spousal abuse; however, the threats and fearfulness you are feeling are criminally actionable events. I would seek legal and professional counseling to assist you with extricating yourself no matter how difficult it may seem. No one can continue to live under these conditions and not be seriously affected, and I’m sure it is not helping your home situation when every day you have to work in the “prison” this bully has created. I sincerely hope you will find the courage to protect yourself and your family from this sick, sick man.A workplace can and should be a place in which mutual respect is the rule. We call that the WEGO spirit. Do weigh this advice and feel free to update us on your actions.

Follow Up Second Opinion: While I agree with the seriousness of the situation, the almost paranoid condition of her boss and the need for legal counsel, I would add that she get in touch with an Abuse and Domestic Violence support system. the number is:1 800 799 SAFE. She may look in the yellow pages for a local number for contact. I look at legal action as a back up. Legal solutions are usually adversarial and perhaps there is a mediative solution that could facilitate a CAREFRONTING technique that would help this doctor get medical help.Also, you could file a complaint to your State Medical Examiner’s Board. This could be in the form of a very private phone conversation or a written complaint that your boss would not even have to know about. I am sure you have his best interests at heart as well as protecting your own life. Best of wishes for your safety,

Dr ED Ed Hollenberg, Guest Respondent & MD WEGO for seeing one’s situation from different perspectives is our goal. Feel free to let us know if these suggestions make sense to you. The Workplace Doctors

Third Opinion: This is the third opinion I have got to address your serious question. You can see that the advice is unanimous. However, only you know your situation; and therefore, it is important that you weigh our advice because it is you and your children who are at the center of this matter.There is only one thing to do – go directly to the police and file a complaint, do not hesitate, and tell them everything – why are you hesitating? File that complaint. Dan Kearney, Guest Respondent & HR Manager WEGO for thinking courage.

Bonnie Jordan