Boss & Secretary Having An Affair

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about a sexual affair between a manager and employee:

I work for a company that is home based in Canada and it has about 700 centers through out the states. There is a president of the company, vice president, marketing manager, and my boss has 2 supervisors with offices in other states. There are 5 full time employees in our office, a full time administrative assistant, and various part time employees during the peak seasons. My boss also is a manager of another center about 20 miles away. He started out there, and then when my previous boss left in June, he now manages both offices.

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Policies About Personal Relationships

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about dating policies:

Can your employer require that you not date anyone you work with? My employer has not done so. It is something that someone at work was questioning. Could there be such a policy because they do not approve how employees behave at work? Some teenagers/young adult workers “hook up” with one another and then make co-workers uncomfortable.

Signed, Interested

Dear Interested:

Your employer has no such policy. Can an employee make a no fraternizing-dating policy? Yes. Are there such policies? I know of none, but I’m sure there are just as there are policies of school systems forbidding teachers from sex with students and prison guards from sex with inmates. In the past more than now, nepotism rules meant that spouses couldn’t work in the same workplace or at least not in the same department. Those have pretty much are gone, but still are a practical concern.

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Believe Co-worker Gave Me STD?

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about a misunderstanding:

I’ve been dating a guy at my factory for 5 months. Untrue rumors led me to believe he was cheating on me, upset I told someone I would have to go get checked out. She went and told everyone including my boyfriend that I’m telling everybody he gave me a social disease. He’s so angry he won’t even listen to me or believe me. The animosity and tension is unbearable, not to mention the dirty looks from everyone. Changing jobs or shifts is out of the question. The guy refuses to talk to me, he just glares at me. Any advice?

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Affair Is Causing Problems In Our Practice!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about a partner’s affair:

We are a group practice with two males and a female. We have more than 25 employees working for us. One of the male partners started an affair with an employee. Other employees are having a lot of problem with this relationship. It has come to the point where we may lose some valuable employees. Should we overlook it, fire the employee, split the group, and ask the male partner in question to leave? Thanks.

Signed, Partner in Distress

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Saw Co-workers Engaging In Sex

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about cowrkers’ sexual behavior:

I witnessed two co-workers sexual behavior at work. Should I report it? One co-worker has expressed hostile behavior towards me at work. But because no one saw or heard anything, I was unable to prove it. Nor did anyone but me see the two engaging in sex, so I can not prove it just like the hostility expressed at me. What should I do?

Signed, I Saw Them

Dear I Saw Them:

My advice in a word is No. Why set your self up for a challenge to your word against the two who likely will deny your accusation. Just tend to your own work and build a record of cooperation, not tattling. The supervisor will catch on if the work doesn’t get done and the two are frequently making sparks fly. How you would like for someone, who thought you were doing something against workplace policy, to report that without first coming to you? You are wise to weigh what you say before you speak. Thinking of the good for all concerned is what I call WEGO mindedness.

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Should A Manager Date An Employee?

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about dating coworkers:

I am in a predicament. I am the manager of a hotel and have an assistant manager that is really cute and a single mother. Ever since I took this job, she seems to have taken a liking to me, and I have done the same to her and her daughter. We have been to dinner together, and she has invited me over to watch movies. We have kept this from being made public at work and will continue to do so. I know that it is against company policy to date coworkers, but I really feel there is a connection. What advise do you have? I feel like I am going to miss an opportunity of a lifetime.

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Partner Is Cheating On Wife and Partner!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about cheating business partner: She s having an affair with my husband’s business partner who is married. This woman is ruining my life. Business hours now are based on their love life and social life.

My husband and his business partner run a successful business. My problem is with their office administrator and my husband’s business partner. She s having an affair with my husband’s business partner who is married. This woman is ruining my life. Business hours now are based on their love life and social life. The business partner starts calling on his cell phone when leaving her home on his way home to find out about what he has missed out on during the afternoon (they don’t work from lunchtime till he leaves her house which is about 6-ish at night) and then calls from his home and starts playing catch-up during the evening. That is when the ‘conference calls’ start with the business partner and my husband and sometimes their office administrator. The three of them work together and then go on business trips together and I am feeling quite left out.

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Wife Abandoned By Husband For Coworker!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about husband and coworker:

My husband is constantly sending text messages to his coworker. I have caught several in which she tells him of her breakup with her boyfriend. He writes back giving support but looking at our phone bill there is so many messages back and forth. Recently he went to Miami and she had put his ticket on her credit card I confronted both and they both said he gave her the money for it. She went several days after to visit her family who lives down there. Now he says he isn’t coming back we have 8- month old twins. I called her and now she is apologetic about getting his ticket and talking to him. They both claim they are only friends. How can I find out if in fact there was an affair?

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Boss Is Very Friendly And Single!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about friendly attractive boss:

I have a boss who is very friendly to me, even flirtatious at times. He’s single and attractive. I like the attention, but I’m not sure if it needs to continue as it’s causing me stress. It’s been going on for 5 months & he hasn’t asked me out – maybe because he’s my boss, maybe not. There’s been lingering eye contact, winking at me, taking & holding my hand or arm, lightly rubbing my arm, occasional hugging & kissing my cheek, nothing too invasive.He often comes by to chat, but never once has asked me out, not even to lunch. What’s going on & what do I do? He is transferring to a different department soon, where he won’t be my boss anymore, but he will still be working with me infrequently and I will still see him daily. I would prefer my e-mail address remain anonymous, but would like a personal reply. Thanks.

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Can I Be Fired For Making Out With A Sexy Guy?

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about possible romance between employees:

I am a disabled female worker in the UK. I have a supported job with the council. In my last department, I met a really sexy, single guy. He is a lot older than me. We swapped contact details and things get intense, on the phone, at times. I think we have stopped the relationship, but would his bosses have any right to fire him if they found out about us, presuming things had gone further?

Signed, What If

Dear What If:

I don’t know. Are there council policy guidelines for you and co-workers? This is something you might be able to learn by a brief talk with your Human Resources Manager or an attorney who deals with labor issues. I welcome hearing from you about what you learn. Sorry, I cannot be more helpful. Probably the best route for you both is to let a sleeping dog lie.– Bill Gorden The Workplace Doctors WEGO at the most intimate level is mutual attraction. However, that is personal business that does not foster the work of the organization.

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