Feeling Harassed and Victimized

Question:

I’m having a lot of issues with work related matters. My manager is aware of certain situations but as of yet hasn’t taken any action. For a period she seemed sympathetic, and I was assured that she knew exactly what was going on. See, she had became aware that our other co-worker as history of complaining and saying things to pick at people. Our previous boss resigned due to her abusive behavior. The problem is now I don’t seem to be able to speak to my actual manager. She doesn’t seem concerned and that makes me lack confidence, as well as generally feeling so low that I don’t really talk too much. I speak regarding work related questions, but I shy-away from personal questions, as I don’t feel comfortable disclosing them. Both my Manager and our co-worker make my workload heavy. I often come into having to deal with my tasks, as well do theirs and tidy up after them. I’m increasingly becoming annoyed that they abandoned their work, expecting me to pick it up so that they can take cigarette/drink breaks or go off chatting to other staff members. It’s gotten to a point where I feel like quitting and I believe this is exactly what my co-worker wants because she’s doing exactly the same things she did to our previous boss, which my current boss is ignoring. I can’t speak to my boss, she becomes abusive and I’m tired of it. I’ve spoken to the General Manager who has passed me onto our Area Manager. Things are quickly getting worse to the point my boss is actually making threats of firing me because I complain too much. However I don’t often say anything. I just get on with my job and let it eat at me.

Signed,

Feel Like Quitting


Answer:

Dear Feel Like Quitting:

You say that you have a heavy workload and that you often must pick up that of others. Moreover you have gone up the ladder with your complaints; as high as your General Manager who has passed on your complaints to an area manager. And recently your boss has threatened to fire you because of your complaints; yet you don’t think you say much of anything and all this eats at you. In short, you are a very unhappy camper! Can this be remedied? Probably not if your perception of how you are treated is accurate. The best you might do is to log the “picking on you” by your coworker and petition in writing for an investigation of the coworker. Meanwhile, you can continue to perform your work without complaint and just your work and not that of others. Sometimes one’s best course is to ignore coworker’s who put you down and earn the respect of others by being a supportive cheer leader of what is going that’s worthy of praise.

You don’t mention one good aspect of your work environment. Do you see your work as “just a job” that keeps the wolf from the door? If so, you have some options: · Switch to a workplace you see as doing something needed to make life livable. · Seek a transfer within your workplace where you would feel your were part of something good. · Grit your teeth, acknowledging that some of us must do jobs we don’t like with people who don’t like us, and get a life outside of your work; one in which you treat your self to what you like to do; read, walk, sing, cook, sew, take yoga, join Toastmasters, volunteer at the hospital or tutor, etc. · Pretend that you like what you are doing and even pretend that you own the company. Work with that in mind, and you might be surprised that you then see ways to cut wasted supplies, wasted time, wasted energy, and wasted money. · Pursue a career within or outside your present job. Get more training. Search out the steps that one must take on that career path. Join an association of those on that career path. Finally, please understand that advice anyone from afar can’t know how you feel and can’t prescribe as well as someone close. Therefore, don’t bug those close to you, telling them about how you are treated, but do find someone who knows you at work or outside and seek his/her advice. Tell them that you need a morale boost to balance out your “put-down” feelings.

The fact that you contacted Ask The Workplace Doctors indicates that you are not satisfied with the way things are going and that you are willing to do what you can to help shape them to be better, and that includes you. Study some of Q&As and click on my associate doctor’s name, Tina Lewis Rowe. That will bring up her insightful uplifting site. See if how you might apply my closing signature: Working together with hands, head and heart takes and makes big WEGOS. By that I mean you need to think past little petty annoyances and think about the big reason you are hired, or seek work elsewhere.

William Gorden