How To Tell Bullying Co-Workers I QUIT!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about resigning:

Tomorrow I have to tell our two co-workers that my husband and I are both leaving the company on May 31st. They are both bi-polar and have random mood swings. They have freaked out on us before for no reason at all and we have spoken to HR and our boss about these issues. However, nothing has ever been done.At times they are great people to work with but the bad outweighs the good. So, e have decided to move on to another company. Here is where I am concerned. We gave two weeks notice to our boss but these coworkers don’t know it yet. I’m scared that tomorrow when we tell them, we are going to be in Hell for the next two weeks. I hate conflict and I’m just not sure how to handle telling them or what to do if they lose their cool.

Signed, Worried

Dear Worried:

I’m going to sound harsh here, but what do you think they will do, hit you? Try to kill you? Use a hammer on your computer? My goodness, you’d think you are fearful for your life for the next two weeks. It’s ten working days and you’ll be gone then. Just get ready for them to be miserable and smile to yourself as you realize you won’t ever have to deal with them again.

Consider writing it to them instead of telling them. Send a “We’re leaving” announcement to everyone, including them. You could go to HR and your boss and tell them that you’re fearful about how these coworkers will react and want to go on the record as saying that you, your personal property and your work are in jeopardy starting the moment you tell them that you are leaving. Your boss and HR might advise you to keep it to yourself–you don’t tell them the information.

They might tell you to let them know if there are problems. Keep in mind that this might be the one thing that will show the coworkers up for what they are, so maybe you shouldn’t avoid letting them be upset.

The moment they do something petty, mean or rude, go to your boss and ask if you can work out of your house or at another desk or somewhere to keep you from being the subject of more of their abuse. Document exactly what they do and describe it exactly as it happens, so he or she can know what you’re talking about. I don’t like to hear people described as bipolar unless you have seen the medical documentation of that fact. More likely they have miserable personalities and have been allowed to treat people badly for decades. It could also be that they do their jobs so well that the bosses are willing to tolerate it. Or maybe your bosses dislike conflict too. Now you see what comes of that! Another thing to remember is this: They aren’t “great” people if they bully you and others. They just act nice now and then. That’s not to their credit because that’s the way we’re all supposed to act at work.If I were in your situation, I’d make my announcement and at the the first sign of them acting up I’d say, “THIS is exactly why we’re leaving. You make life Hell here at work and we’re tired of it. So, be miserable for the next two weeks if you want, but after that I’ll be gone and happy to be away from you two.”

If you don’t do something like that you’ll leave without them ever realizing their role in it, and I think that would be a shame for the sake of others who are left behind.You’ll handle this fine. Don’t lose one moment’s peace about it. Just make the announcement without apology. Don’t weasel into it and try to sell it, just say it. It’s your life and you can do with it what you want. Then, focus on work until it’s time to go home. Keep focused until your ten days are up and you can get out of there. Celebration time! Best wishes and let us know what happens!

Tina Lewis Rowe

Tina Lewis Rowe

Tina had a thirty-three year career in law enforcement, serving with the Denver Police Department from 1969-1994 and was the Presidential United States Marshal for Colorado from 1994-2002. She provides training to law enforcement organizations and private sector groups and does conference presentations related to leadership, workplace communications and customized topics. Her style is inspirational with humor.