Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about jealous over equal pay:
Due to some unforeseen circumstance, my junior and I had to leave one job and lookout for another. Fortunately we both got jobs in same workplace but now he is getting the same salary as me, whereas earlier he was reporting to me, I trained him and everything. Now I am jealous. Why it is happening with me? Why do I feel differently now? I can’t stop thinking about it and I’m even thinking of looking elsewhere for work, but I don’t have any other offers. Please help me to get rid of this jealousy and feel happy for his progress, after all I trained him, developed him so I should feel happy for him.
Signed, Jealous and Don’t Feel Good About That
Dear Jealous and Don’t Feel Good About That:
You are making progress because you ask to get rid of jealousy and feel happy for the progress of the individual you trained. Just saying that to yourself indicates you realize that jealousy hurts you and that you want it to stop. Moreover likely jealousy shows in the way to now relate and that hurts him too.Here are several suggestions. Possibly they will help or prompt you to think of others that will:
1.Talk to him about how you feel. Admit you feel guilty about feeling jealous. You mention “Due to some unforeseen circumstance” you both had to hunt for a new job. Apparently, there was a problem caused by you or him. Is that something you need to acknowledge? Ask for his suggestions about what you and he might do to work with each other without this. Think of it as a way to grow in character for that is what you want; to be big enough not to allow status come between you.
2. Focus on your job as a career path, not just as a job. Look in the mirror and review where you are career-wise. What do you really want to do in your life? Are you content with your job and its direction? Study your new organization. What do you know about its history and prospects? Is there opportunity for training within that would make you more valuable to it? Or might you join an association of that would make you see your job as more professional? Even if you see this job as just a job, you could take training outside that would enable you to apply for jobs that you might feel were more to your liking. Good bosses are interested in their employees’ dreams. If you confide to your boss where you’d like to be in five years, she/he might help you move in that direction, either within your company or elsewhere.
3. Shift from jealousy to customer commitment. Who are your customers internal and/or external? What is the feedback you are getting about how well your work satisfies them? If you determine to find ways to cut wasted supplies, wasted time, wasted energy you’ll begin to see your job as part of something important; making your workplace survive and thrive. Continuous quality improvement allows little time for pettiness. I put it this way; ego can be replaced by wego.If you scan other of the hundreds of questions answered in our archives, you will see my signature: Working together with hands, head, and heart takes and makes big WEGOS. There is much more that could be said, but the important thing is that you are not a victim. Jealous in an ego thing. Wego is exciting, collaborative, and enriching.