Should I Quit My Job, Since My Manager Doesn’t Support Me Against an Insulting Employee?

Question: I’m a 29 y/o female who works in a male dominated field as a highly-trained industrial worker. I used to work the day shift, but a year ago I switched to working nights due to how I was being treated by the lead hand at the time.

A couple days ago this same lead hand reeked of alcohol (not the first time I’ve smelled it on him), and when I had to ask a work related question in front of both my supervisor and him, he immediately told me, “Shut the fuck up.” My supervisor began laughing, and so did the lead hand.

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Loss of Trust After Double Standards In Hiring

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about loss of respect for manager: Hiring an individual without the same credentials as I have.

Five months ago I was promoted to a management position after working toward the position for a year and a half. The woman who took my place worked for the company for a few years in the sales department. A few weeks after she took the job, she quit to work somewhere else. Now, a month or more after she quit, she’s being rehired for a management position just like the one I had to work so hard for. That position requires one year of experience. This action has made me lose complete faith in the managers I work for. I love my job, but no longer have respect for my managers. Any thoughts?

Signed, Wondering Why

Dear Wondering Why:

I can understand why you are feeling disappointed and hurt after it seems you had to jump through hoops to get a management job but the rehired employee does not.You say you love your work. If you stay there you probably have no option but to focus on the parts of the work that you love the most, appreciate the fact that you still have the management job you wanted, and move forward to show that you, at least, were a good choice for manager.

Consider asking your own manager about the decision. You’re part of management now and should be able to discuss such things openly. Or, maybe you have already talked to upper level managers about it and found their reasons to not be acceptable, even though they think they were right. I can think of several reasons why the former employee would be rehired as a manager.

One reason would be that the requirement for one year’s experience might have been met by her time in sales. She may have had some experiences there that they need in a new manager. Or, it could be they are needing to hire a manager and would rather hire someone they knew formerly; and maybe liked a lot; than hire a stranger.Or, it could be that higher levels want her back and the only way she would consider it was if she could come back as a manager.

The other option is that she called someone who could make a hiring decision, said she was sorry she left but that she needs a higher salary. The decision-maker decided to do her a favor and find a job for her that would pay her more. Those kind of hiring and promotional choices are impossible to explain to employees, so some other, more logical sounding, reason is usually given. Many hard working, high quality employees have had to sadly accept the fact that their manager shows more loyalty for relationships than for good performance and behavior. Or, that their manager talks big but doesn’t have the courage to follow through. Or, that their manager seems completely oblivious to what is happening in the workplace.

Your challenge now is to not let this have a lasting impact on you and your work. Nothing lasts forever and many things can change quickly. Keep yourself ready for any opportunity or challenge that might come your way. Be courteous and appropriately friendly to the newly hired manager. She may feel awkward about it too. Or, she may not. But, at least you can show that you are accepting and helpful with everyone.Also, keep in mind that since you are a manager, you are responsible for employees who need your support, encouragement, direction, and intervention about issues every day. Be a model for them about how to overcome frustrations and disappointments at work. You’ll feel better about it over time.Best wishes to you with this. If you have the time and wish to do so, let us know how it turns out and how you dealt with it.

Tina Lewis Rowe read more