You Just Don’t Want To Hear!

Question to Ask the Workplace Doctors about insults about hearing disability:

I live in northwest Indiana. I’m really having a problem with my boss and I’m out of solutions. I have only been employed here for about 2 months. The first day I was there I was told (by my boss) that he is a real a## hole and not take anything he says personal. I’m hearing impaired, I have good hearing aids but still they don’t let me hear as normal people do.Well the problem I’m having is he’s making very discriminating comments about my hearing saying things like “I think your hearing is bull sh#t, you can hear just fine you don’t want to hear”. “Why can you hear me now and not earlier”? Constant insulting remarks about my intelligent. He often calls me goofy. He has told me he could get more work done without me, and that I had no idea how to do electrical work prior to coming here.

I’m also getting comments from the other long time employees; they’re saying, “that I suck”, and “I have no idea how to do anything.” I have tried to talk with him but that leads to more insults being handed out. I am not the only one getting these kind of comments, but I am getting more than anyone else. This is really affecting me in my job as well as my personal life can you please offer some advice as how to deal with this behavior. I am currently searching around for a better job, but who knows how long that can take

Signed, Hard of Hearing

Dear Hard of Hearing:

Your boss is a jerk and jerks everyone else around. You can bet that you can’t change him and the best way you can save your sanity and influence him for the better is to change your attitude. Nobody can intimidate you unless you give him the permission to do so. You will be challenged to let his remarks fall off you like water off a ducks back. It is a mistake to take it personally. You can take up that challenge or change jobs. Since you haven’t found another job, you might use this time to learn a new skill, which is to strengthen your own self-esteem and skills on the job. Show him that you are trying your best. He needs to be clear about what he expects of you and you must simply ask exactly what he expects, then do it your very best.One question. What is your purpose for living? Are you doing the job you would like to do the rest of your life, or are you just working to make money? Money is good, but what is more important is for you to really enjoy the job you are doing. Read the book “The Purpose Driven Life” by Rick Warren.

Good Luck P.S. Dr. Ed is lives in Indiana and northern Indiana is where I grew up. It’s not what others think of you that matters. Rather it is what’s inside of you. There are good places at which to work. Focus on gaining the skills that will enable you to work where you can feel you are making a real contribution to what matters. That begins by WEGO mindedness. Do keep us posted on what you do. Bill Gorden

Guest Respondent, Ed Hollander, M.D.